By His Spirit

I recently trained for and completed my first 1/2 marathon (13.1 miles). I started off by not being able to even run 1 mile without feeling out of breath. Then I slowly added more time and eventually I made it to 13 miles.

The journey was not easy but I know that everything I did was unto God so I was motivated to push beyond my perceived limitations.

I looked at my body and said "you don't look like a marathon runner"...."you should have trained harder and lost more weight". Then God ministered to my heart. He said "you are doing this by my spirit not with your body".

I had to remember that I was doing it for His glory. I wasn't trying to prove to myself or to anyone else that I could do it. I was ultimately fulfilling God's purpose.

I was aligning my body with His spirit and moving by faith. It didn't matter what the external looked like. It was all about His spirit and His power.

So I finished my last week of training more inspired than ever. Was I nervous? Of course but I had to meditate on the truth. The truth said that I was more than able to accomplish what I thought was impossible through my ability to rest in God.

I didn't have to sacrifice my body to fulfill my destiny. I only had to surrender and allow my body to be used to bring Him glory. I am the Temple of God.

On December 4th, I did it. I actually finished my first half marathon with a time of 2:53:53. I did it all by His spirit. I praise Him with all that I am because He is good and so worthy of my praise.

This marathon was not just about my physical abilities. It made me realize that everything I do must be executed in this manner. I must move by His spirit and allow it to empower me and carry me across the finish line.

No matter what the external circumstances may look like I have the power to endure them through resting in His love and allowing His spirit to empower me.

I am built for success. Victory knows my name and love is my home. Nothing is impossible because I walk in the joy of the Lord.

Praise Him!

Living my life surrendered the wind....surrendered to His spirit. Living my life awaken and conscious of my power, my calling, my worth.

Taking nothing for granted. Realizing that who I am and what I do are all for His glory.

Does it feel right? Does it bring Him glory? Does it align with His word? Does it stand for truth?

Only God can direct your path. Only He can sustain your strength.

His power is forever moving....His love inspiring....His grace motivating and bringing hope.

Nothing can cage up or contain what is His goodness. It is more than enough to fill this cup and bring forth blessing for others. It is more than enough to find the words to describe.

To God be ALLLLLL the praise...AMEN!!!

Attached

We are attached to a power and source greater than our carnal self. We are more than our ego...our human identity.

When we begin to step away from the Truth of who we are we begin to grasp for air. We begin to fight for life or what we thought was life.

We begin to desperately and frantically look for ways to distract our vulnerability as we are stripped from what we perceive to be our true self.

We can't survive when we step away from the source of our existence. We can't function without the power of God propelling us forth.

In God we live, breathe and have our Being.

Stayed attached and be empowered by remaining in the Presence of God.

I am here and HERE I STAND!

I am a strong and powerful woman of God. What I have been through, what others have done to me, and my "failures" do not define or validate my worth.

I am strong and powerful because God created me. I am desirable, wanted, loved, attractive, intelligent, sexy and strong. No one can take away or add to my worth.

I am who God says I am because He designed me to fulfill is destiny....His purpose. I am not just here on this Earth to fill space but I am here to move, transform and reconcile space. I am here to redeem, restore and manifest the Glory of God.

I am a powerful woman and I will stand each day for the truth. I will consciously surrender my life and my will to God's so that I may live true and real....so that I may fulfill my calling...my destiny.

Today I stand....Today I live....Today I fully awaken...never looking back but always moving forward in the spirit of God.

Why Not?!?

Imagine being fully yourself. Letting go of all fears, doubts and insecurities. Imagine walking this Earth aware of your true calling and fulfilling it with each step. Imagine holding His hand and trusting that no matter where you are He will never let go. Imagine knowing that He is always in control.

Letting go and believing. Believing and recieving. Releasing and walking in freedom. High above every situation. Breaking through. Flying high.

Why not?

The Opportunity

Many of us ask God for many things and never understand the process it takes to obtain that request. We often ask for love, stability, patience, peace or understanding. We ask for natural possessions and wait on God to fulfill them.

What I have come to realize is that everything we need is already within us. So when we make our requests unto God He brings certain situations into our lives to draw it out of us. He creates a situation in which your patience is called forth. He strengthens you by exposing your weakness.

Although the process may be painful at times it is that process that perfects us and prepares us for the fulfillment of His glory. We are the glory of God. He will reveal His righteousness and love through our testimony. We are the living word of God.

If you want love then you must get past the fear and walk by faith. If you seek peace then you must lean not unto your own understanding but acknowledge God in all your ways. If you desire God's favor then you must give unselfishly to others. What you sow is what you reap.

We often feel that "the opportunity" is an attack from the "enemy" when in reality the only enemy you have is your own carnal mind. "It" (the enemy) is a crack in our faith. The speck in our eye. It is the stormy sea. It is your unstable mind.

The opportunity is a chance to grow stronger and fulfill your destiny. Adversity is the breeding ground for greatness. Resistance makes us stronger. Don't give up.......keeping pushing and break through the silence.

Many of us live in the silence of our fears. We dare not step forward and proclaim God's promises because they seem impossible. We are afraid of what others may think. We are afraid that we might get disappointed.

We can't remain in that mold. We can't continue to allow our fears and insecurities to hold us back from what God has promises us. He sent His son so that can live and live abundantly. We are not supposed to lack. We are supposed to be abundant....our cup should be overflowing.

Take the opportunity and don't look back. Walk by faith and not by sight.

Suffering

"Suffering is evidence that weakness exists"

I heard this quote today in a movie and it really resonated with me. I remembered the scripture in the bible that says "My strength is made perfect in weakness". This made me understand this quote in a different light.

We suffer...feel pain....experience heartache when we don't lean on the promises of God. God said "lean not unto your own understanding but acknowledge me in all your ways and I shall direct your path".

So I suffer when I lean on my own understanding. When I try to analyze and figure out why something is happening in my life. When I try to manipulate and force things to play out the way I want them to. When I allow my emotions to control me. When I let my circumstance define me.

But when I lean on my faith and trust that God is in control then I stop suffering. Although life may be spinning out of control I know it is not out of God's reach. I allow myself to be strengthened by God and therefore come out victorious and remain in perfect peace.

Freedom

Who we are is not what we have gone through. We are not our testimony. We are the power that manifests from the victory of our journey. We are the infinite possibility of hope, joy, love, peace and understanding. We are the wisdom that illuminates the darkness of uncertainty.

Stepping out of the shadow of our past takes a great amount of courage. That courage is drawn out of us through the adversity we often experience in our lives. It is not something that can be manufactured. It is an element of who we are deep down beneath the level of the superficial.

The courage to move forward and release the pain is not easily obtained. It takes determination and discipline. It takes obedience and sacrifice. We must lay down our own carnal understanding and lean on the spirit of God to lead us in the direction of our destiny.

Many may not understand your leap of faith. They may not understand the surge of energy that propels you forward and makes you move with conviction and purpose. That amount of faith and courage comes from a deep level of intimacy with God.

It is not a shallow "christian" relationship in which we think we must do this or we will not reach heaven. This comes from a place in which you recognize that you are God and all you do is a manifestation of heaven. Heaven is not a place we are trying to reach. It is a spiritual awakening. It is a freedom. It is a perception and understanding.

We don't seek to please God in order to receive a reward. We seek to please God because it is a fulfillment of our destiny. It is the purpose for which we have been created. We are significant because we are tied to a promise. God has a plan for your life.

We are not in this world experiencing God as a fairytale. We are God and created to awaken the world to a deeper consciousness in which they can also walk this Earth with freedom knowing their true identity.

Freedom to be who they are without limitations or labels......without ideologies and expectations. Stepping out of what is "normal" takes more than your knowledge of what is right and wrong. Stepping out and becoming who you were created to be in the fullness of God's glory takes a radical act of devotion and loyalty.

You can't be concerned with what others think or say. You must be completely surrendered. There is no room for ego or self indulgence. To walk in the fullness of your calling you must be synchronized with the very heartbeat of God. His spirit fills your lungs. His thoughts fill your mind. His love saturates your heart.

Everything you say and do must be in accordance to His will. Releasing the past....releasing your insecurities, your pains, your understanding is what opens that door of TRUTH.

Nothing else exists but the TRUTH of God. Step forward without reservation and be filled with all things possible. The only limitations are the ones your place on yourself.

Be free and breathe. No one is holding you back but yourself.

Crossroads

There comes a time in our lives where we must make some decisions. We must stand for truth and make a bold decision to be fully aware and conscious of our greater calling on Earth. It can no longer be about what happened to you in your past. It must be about what you have been designed to do and whether or not what is in your life is adding any value to your life. Are the relationships and associations you have propelling you in the direction of your calling? Are they adding any worth to your life? Are the energizing your spirit?

We must begin to open the eyes of our understanding and trust in the Love of God. God's love sustains us and ables us to be all that we can be without struggle. God's love opens up our hearts and allows us to be fully present in the NOW so that we can walk by faith and be full of His glory....... not lacking anything but being full and whole.

When you reach this place you are fully aware that you have arrived. You are aware that there are some things that need to be purged. There are some things that need to be detached. There are some things that need to be put to rest. Everything needs to be released into the hands of God and you need to move forward with Passion knowing that what is within you is great than anything external.

You have the power to create, restore, reconcile and prosper. You have the ability to make things happen and cause them to manifest in such a manner that they help inspire others to do the same. We are full of God's glory, FULL of His power and with Him ALL things are possible.

DO YOU BELIEVE that He can exceed your every expectation?

Release!!!!!!

Last night I was invited to attend a Vision Board making party at my friend Loren's house. I had a feeling earlier that day that is was going to be an emotional and empowering event. I almost didn't go because it was so hot outside and the drive was far BUT something was pulling me to go.

I got there a little late and when I walked in Loren was speaking and sharing some of her amazing achievements with us. She is a successful motivational speaker, author, mother, business woman, and master teacher for Tony Robbins. That doesn't even begin to describe the amazing life she has lived this far. She has traveled the world speaking to people, inspiring and motivating them to pursue their dreams.

I was one of the lucky ones that was invited to attend this empowering event last night and I felt so privileged. I drew energy from her amazing spirit and left feeling like I was well on my way to fulfilling my destiny.

She asked me to stand up and share why I chose to come to the event and what I wanted to achieve by attending. I shared how I was on a mission to lose weight and run my first half marathon. I said I had already managed to lose over 60 lbs but that I still have more to lose. I also had many other goals I desired to achieve and I knew I needed direction and guidance. Everyone rejoiced with me and I sat down.

Then Loren used me as an example and said how something inside of me was pulling me to achieve my goals. She said pull is greater than a push. She said I was convicted to get healthy and "release my weight". She said I did not "lose" my weight because it was never to be found again. I would never put it back on. She said I released it. That hit me like a ton of bricks.

It is so true. I am "releasing" my weight and everything that it stands for. My weight was a reflection of years of pain and disappointments. When I stood up within myself and decided to take control I was releasing the mentality of being a victim.

I no longer allowed the circumstances in my life to feed my soul. I took control of my life and took responsibility for my actions. I became disciplined and it reflected outwardly.

Loren asked us to right down a statement that we would start our day with everyday. She said what you say first thing in the morning sets the mood for the rest of the day. If we wake up wishing we didn't have to and complaining about everything under the sun then we will reap the fruit of that seed.

Then we were asked to right "I AM" statements that would be a mantra to our lives. Even if you have yet to achieve something you are aiming for you must state that it already is or it will never be. You have the power to create it by believing and focusing your energy on it.

She was adamant about getting out of our heads and allowing God or the Universe to flow through us and allow the energy to create. She said this is your time to put in your order. Then she gave this amazing analogy that left me feeling convicted and inspired to change the way I feel about my future and the role I play in it.

She said if you go to a diner and the waitress comes up to you and asks you what you want and you say "I don't know", she is going to skip you and go to the next person. So then the other people order their meals and she leaves and puts in the order. When the order is up she comes back to your table and gives you "NOTHING" because you didn't order nothing.

That is the way the Universe or God works. God's word states "you have not because you ask not". You must ask in faith and believe that you will receive it. We can't just go around wishing and dreaming. You must also put action behind your passion and desires. Each step is a step of faith that brings you closer to your destiny.

We were instructed to also write down our non negotiables. Just like brushing our teeth and getting dressed in the morning. These are things that are non negotiable in our lives. Something we stand for and won't surrender for anyone.

Then we proceeded to allow our creative energy to flow by feeling each moment of our vision. Writing and expressing ourselves as if it had come to pass. The awesome part of this is that Loren had already done these exercises years ago and had manifested many fruits from them. This was not all talk or wishful thinking. This is actually how life works.

It is not about creating from our heads or from an egoic place but rather letting the spirit of God or The Universe flow through you and empower you to change. She said that when we meditate and visualize the outcome then the Universe will move and begin to create opportunities.

You have heard me share this before and how I meditate and visualize my achievements. When I run on the treadmill and want to stop, I think about how good it will feel when I cross the finish line at the marathon. I think about how amazing it feels to be healthy and strong. I think about helping other women achieve their goals and inspiring them to be their best.

Since I have allowed this energy to flow through me doors have begun to open. Opportunities have knocked at my door and it feels so amazing. Like I have said before I may not be at my goal yet but I am where I want to be. As long as I am in the will of God....aligned with The Universe and fully conscious of my power then I have peace.

Things may not be ideal in my life but they are purposeful. They have driven me to be a better person. They have prepared me to be what God wants me to be in order to fulfill my destiny. Through the adverstity God has strategically placed people in my life that will help guide me, strengthen me, and encourage me along my journey. They have helped equip me for the journey.

We often spend more time trying to create our future instead of preparing ourselves to walk in it. I am taking this time in my life right now to prepare myself. Things are moving and things are shifting. Every shift may not feel good to me but it is essential, it is important and it can't be avoided. I must endure certain hardships in order to be more effective in my calling.

So I am going to continue to "release" this weight and walk forward with power knowing that one day I will wake up and I will be where I have always dreamed of being. I will be fully me and walking in truth.

Cleansing My Soul

Lately I have had a strange feeling in my spirit. I usually feel this way when things are moving and transitioning in my life. It is like the thunder before a storm.

Sure enough things began to fall around me this week. I experienced some anxiety and stress but still managed to hold on to my faith.

I have learned through my journey that no matter what opposition comes your way you can overcome it by your perception. You can see the opposition as destruction or you can look at it as an opportunity.

I know that God is in control of my life. I also know that what ever should be in my life is my life to teach me and mold me into the vessel that God called me to be.

There are great things in store for me. I know it and I feel it. Over these last couple of months I have became more disciplined and it is beginning to manifest into amazing opportunities.

I can't focus on what is going "wrong" in my life. It is not really going wrong. It is all according to the will of God. I would often find myself saying "I may not be where I want to be but.....". I recently have changed that saying to "I am were I want to be. I am in the will of God".

Even if I don't like where I am I must realize that I am in God's will. I am faithful that He has placed me where I am for a season and a reason. Nothing is out of His control as long as I surrender it all to Him.

Along this process of self discovery I have endured many things. I have done somethings I am ashamed of and people have done things to me that have left me feeling depleted. I have carried those emotions and memories for too long.

There are days that I am happy and then the next moment I find myself reacting harshly. It is like I snap from one personality to the next with out any thought. Why? Because I have buried emotions and unresolved issues. Instead of letting them go I have covered them up. I have created walls and dug trenches to hid within.

So today I realized that this situation I find myself in has come about so that I begin to cleanse my soul of the unresolved issues. I can't keep hiding and expecting them to go away. I can't keep hiding behind layers of insecurities and fears. I can't keep saying I am strong and powerful while holding onto this baggage that pulls me down and depletes me.

I am cleansing my soul today. Regardless of what people may think about me I have to let go. I have to release the emotions and detach myself from memories that have kept me bond. I must make room for everything God has in store for me.

It is time to bloom. It is time to fly. It is time to be fully me.

I would rather you hate me for who I am.....than love me for who I am not.

Be Confident!!!

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”
Theodore Roosevelt

I came across this quote today and was so moved and inspired. I am convinced that those that breed success don't see themselves as victims. They harness the power they have within and press forward with a clear vision of their goals in mind. No matter what may come their way be it "good" or "bad" they know where they are headed and they make no excuses.

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ....-Philippians (KJV).

No matter where we are in our journey we must be confident that what God has started in our lives He will finish. He will perform every plan and promise that He has made.

You have been created for a specific purpose. It calls you to be great and fully conscious of your being. We don't walk this Earth powerless and defeated. We have everything we need within us to accomplish every goal and vision God has placed in our heart.

You must create a relentless spirit that holds on and stands for truth no matter what may come your way.

Blockage!

I woke up this morning and was just laying in bed thinking as I often do. I like to use the quiet stillness of the morning to reflect, meditate and pray.

I was thinking about my journey and how I don't have much more to go in order to reach my initial weight loss goal. I am 35 lbs away from what I feel will be a healthy weight for my body. Once I achieve that weight loss I will then focus more on sculpting than weight loss.

So as I lay there thinking I realized that a part of me still holds onto some insecurities. I kind of feel afraid to reach my goal because I will be more confident, look better and draw more attention to myself.

For years I hid behind layers of fat because I didn't want to deal with my fears and insecurities. Now that the weight is coming off I don't have much to hid behind anymore.

I don't want to hide but subconsciously I have a sense of fear. My inner spirit is ready to soar but the fleshly human side of me still wants to hold back. I have to tell myself that it is okay to be successful. It is okay to feel beautiful and confident.

Since that has never been a reality in my life before, it is foreign and a little uncomfortable to me. That is why stepping out and doing things that are not comfortable to my flesh is an important part of breaking through the limitations I place on myself.

Every time I do something that makes me nervous I break another link of the chain. I break perceptions and thoughts that I have formed about myself that no one understands but me and God.

It is such a deeper journey then just losing weight. It is more about me becoming who God has always intended me to be.....and it feels SOOOOO good. :)

I used to feel so unworthy of love and attention because I had such low self esteem. Years of physical and emotional abuse had left me depleted and afraid. Now at times I find myself feeling those emotions again. I have to remind myself that I am so worthy and that I am precious and valuable beyond measure.

I can so relate to the story of the Virgin Mary. When we was told that she was chosen to carry the Son of God she couldn't believe it. She didn't think she was worthy enough to do such an important and powerful thing. She didn't see herself the way God saw her....BLESSED AND HIGHLY FAVOURED.

At times our perception doesn't align itself with God's revelation of us. We don't always see ourselves as equal with God and able to do greater works because our true identity is hidden under layers of pain and fear.

This is why this feeling of awakening and evolving into what God has called me to do and be is such an amazing feeling. Words can't even describe how awesome it feels. I am so excited to press through and continue to unclog this blockage. Great things are to come and I will be open and ready to receive it ALL.

Speaking Into The Atmosphere

I have been writing this blog for several months now and I am not sure if anyone reads it. I am not really concerned with it for my personal glory. I started this blog to bring glory to God and to help uplift the hearts, minds and souls of those that are drawn to read it.

I speak and release these blogs into the atmosphere and ask God to continue to draw people unto Himself. I will continue to lift up the name of God because He has been my strength in every time of need. He has been my source of life and I will praise Him everyday.

Through the good and through what I have perceived to be bad, there has been purpose. God's plan is perfectly coming into alignment and for that I am so grateful.

I have tried to live my life surrendered to Him, releasing all of my expectations and seeking the will of God. Although, I can't see with my natural eyes the fruits of my labor I will continue to press. I will continue to let the anointed word of God express itself through this platform.

I speak and create the perfect will of God. Let your will be done Father. This is your blog...your heart. Amen.

Worshiping The Son

"We were created to worship The Son."

Our very existence is centered around the concept of presenting ourselves...these mortal fleshly bodies unto God. We are to live "our lives" surrendered unto God, allowing Him to use us to serve a greater purpose than we can conceive with our natural carnal minds.

Many of us feel that calling that we have been purposed for. We feel that burning desire to serve. We have no problem yielding ourselves....giving ourselves up to serve a specific group of people. Some of us feel it is our calling to minister to the youth, some the elderly, the wounded or the broken hearted.

Whatever you have been called to do you have been tested in. You have been prepared through your journey. That is why we have learned through our journey to be yielded unto God. To worship Him in Spirit and in Truth.

We know when we are being called and drawn in a certain area of our lives because we are anointed to serve. We are created to worship.

Pushing Past Limitations

Sometimes letting go of things and people has more to do with you then the other person. At times we hold onto emotions, experiences and events and they become all too consuming in our lives. We think that if we release someone that it will help us heal. The opposite can be true at times because it is the thorn in our side that often helps to reveal the beauty deep within.

Many times we reflection our insecurities and fears on other people because we are afraid to look at them in ourselves. We don't want to feel vulnerable or alone. We fail to realize that the biggest most important part of growing and blooming is to push past our limitations.

We have to be willing to push against the resistance in our lives and surrender our hearts to the possibilities. We often close up our hearts because of the fear we have of feeling pain. We don't want to let anyone in. We play the role of having it all together. We paint our pretty face and act like we are happy. When in reality we are falling apart inside and we feel lost and alone.

No one can heal that part within you. No one can make you feel something that you are not willing to feel on your own. You can't love someone else if you don't first love yourself. You can't set someone free if you don't first free yourself.

There is so much in my heart right now because I am beginning to bloom. I am beginning to let go of some very painful situations and emotions in my life. I have allowed myself to be attached and defined by these things and they have caused me such pain. They have left me scarred, bruised and so far from my true self.

I have learned to stop blaming others for my life and take responsibility for myself. I may have not caused the events to happen in my life but I have allowed then to control me. I have allowed them to steal my identity and essentially steal my power.

As I step into this new journey of my life I release everything that has held me back. I step out of the shadows of my pain, shame and disappointments. I know that I am much more then the pain and rejection I have experienced. I am strong. I am powerful and I deserve to live my life to the fullest.

I will take God's hand and continue to walk on this path feeling empowered and fearless as I press through every limitation that has tried to define me.

Use Me For Your Glory

Walking through this door that at one time felt so far away.

Closing a door that once caused me so much pain.

Where do I go from here?

What path do I take?

Do I hold on to something that seems to be slipping away?

Do I let it go and hope that it will return?

My eyes are filled with tears?

My heart with joy?

Only you know what my future holds and in you I lose control.

No one else can touch my heart

No one can heal my soul

You have been the constant peace in my life....my source of strength.

To you I lift my hands, surrender my heart and say:

Here I am

Do your will

Use me for your glory

I have been formed before the foundation of this world to tell your story

Use me for your glory

My heart belongs to you

Do your will

Use me for your glory!

Open and Ready!

This post may sound strange to those that are not conscious (spiritually awaken). I felt the need to share this because I believe it is directly related to the new lifestyle I have chosen to live.

To be conscious is to be aware and awaken to the power we have as spiritual beings. We acknowledge that we are one with the Universe or God (whatever you chose to call it....it is all the same in my book:) and that we have the ability to change our world by accessing that power.

Many times we get caught up in the "world" or the illusion of "reality" because we have been brainwashed to believe that we are only what we see. We don't understand that there is something much deeper than the surface level of things. We conform ourselves into the image (translation: mindset) of this world. We buy into the illusion and therefore become a product of it.

We accept what others say to be truth because we have not tapped into the truth that is already within us. God created us and He spoke us into existance, so we are built by faith. Faith is the spoken, unadulterated word of God.

In my personal journey to become all that God created me to be....to become more awaken and conscious of my power...I believe God lead me to become Vegan. Not just for the health factor but to become more conscious of myself and the world.

I have noticed since I have refrained from consuming animal flesh and processed (adulterated food products) that there is a free flowing energy coming from me. I am more intuned with my surroundings and I don't partake of things that are not truth. I don't crave the need for drama or want to be around it. I am sensitive to the needs of others and have more compassion.

It is like the arteries of my heart have been unclogged and God's love is flowing freely through me. It is an amazing feeling and I am so grateful that I have learned to be obedient to God's spirit. If I wasn't obedient I wouldn't have this opportunity to reach my full potential.

We are a manifestation of God. The bible says that God is love. God is also unlimited and full of power. With Him all things are possible. So I can never reach my full potential unless I am aligned with Him. My heart must be open to receive His direction.

I don't know in my carnal, human mind all that God has for me but I know it is BIG. Not because I am more special then anyone else but because I am called and chosen. The bible says that MANY are called but FEW are chosen. Few chose to answer the call. If my arteries were clogged....if my heart was closed I wouldn't have been able to hear and discern His spirit calling.

I am open and I am ready....GLORY TO GOD!

LOVE!!

Being open to love allows us to enter into our full potential. It unclogs the arteries of our hearts and allows life to flow.

Holding onto grudges, ill feelings, disappointments and pain steal from our ability to love. It hinders us from reaching the full potential of our being. We were all created from love and are to remain free, unobstructed vessels from which God's creative energy can flow and manifest.

Releasing our perceptions, expectations, emotions and needs is what allows us to love unconditionally. We must remember that we are a manifestation of God....God is love so we are to be a manifestation of that love.

God's love is not conditional. He is not prideful. He does not remind us of our errors or seek to remind us of them. God allows the power of His unconditional love to set us free from condemnation. He opens our hearts and releases His ointment so that we can heal from shame and pain.

Open your heart to love and your whole life will change. The people around you will change and your heart will be full of joy.

What will you stand for?

What will you stand for in your life? Will you allow everything around you to fall apart? Will you fall apart with it? Or will you stand and proclaim the word of the Lord? Speak truth.....speak life and you will see your circumstances change.

Adversity does not come to destroy us....it doesn't come to define us. We are not to crumble at it's feet. We are to stand and gird up our loins with truth. We are to speak to the storm and rightly divide the word of God.....using the wisdom of God and not the knowledge of man.

Stand for what you believe in and don't let your circumstances dictate your future. What God has promised with come to pass. The truth of God will prevail. Just be faithful and walk by faith.....NOT by sight. Take a stand and plant your feet firm until your CHANGE comes.

Attached To A Destiny

It is tough to navigate through life sometimes when you are conscious of the fact that your life is not really "your life". You understand that your life has been bought with a price and you have been created to bring God glory. Every adversity you endure is designed to make you stronger and to essentially draw out the true you.

The greatest things are birthed through resistance and pressure. A diamond wouldn't be a diamond without pressure. A butterfly wouldn't be strong enough to soar without the struggle of transformation.

I know that at times we look at ourselves as a "little me" with "BIG PROBLEMS". We have no idea that this "little me" has been designed to carry out BIG things. We have the ability to change lives and nations through the experience of our "BIG PROBLEMS". Our "BIG PROBLEMS" pale in comparison to the BIG plans God has destined for us.

It is easy to get caught up in the illusion of our issues and want to give up before we even reach our promise. Our minds often become conformed and we meditate on things that are not true. We create scenarios in our minds. We calculate our steps out of fear. We put ourselves in a box and limit our potential.

We think that because we have gone through something or endured a heartache that we will always carry that label. Maybe we even think we can never heal or move on past that place. What we fail to realize at times is that we might have had to pass through or endure a certain thing but we were not meant to remain there. Along our journey we have learned from the places we have passed through but our goal and final destination is beyond that. God has a plan for our lives. Everything is mapped out. All we have to do is keep pressing forward NO MATTER WHAT.

We are each attached to a destiny. No matter how much it hurts. No matter how much you don't understand and want to give up.......YOU CAN'T. Something deep down within you keeps the fire burning. You might have a melt down at times and want to pull over and look at your map again BUT your faith....your calling....your purpose keeps you going.

We each have a truth within us that supersedes anything we see with our natural eyes. Yes things may be falling a part in your life but that truth keeps you believing. That truth keeps you pressing towards your destiny. You might have to stop and recalculate your steps. You might have to regroup and chart a new course but God is faithful. You will reach your appointed destination.

During your journey you may have others trying to give you their opinion. They may give you advice from their own experiences but you have to stay focused. Your journey is not the same as everyone else's journey. People may not understand why you keep holding onto something that seems impossible. You may not even understand it at times either. There may be times that you get lost and lose focus but God will always be there to put you back on track. He will always be there to guide you and lead the way.

I know that other roads may seem easier and shorter but stay on course. God has already went before you and prepared the road. Although at times it may seem bumpy and you might feel alone know that God is always by your side. When things become uncertain, lean not unto your own understanding. Trust that the truth within you will carry you through. Never forget that you are attached to a destiny and there is no escaping it. No matter how hard you fight against it you will reach it. No matter how hard it gets you are strong enough to endure it.

Keep pressing and keep believing. Let God be your navigator and you will be just fine.

The end is greater then the beginning.

Set Yourself Free

At times it becomes tough to live your life surrendered to God when your life seems to be falling a part. It is difficult to believe in something that is beyond your comprehension.

Things become so heavy that you lose your ability to soar. Your mind becomes so cloudy that you lose sight of your vision.

The obstacles in your life seem to scale over the opportunities. Every door seems to be closing in your face. You can't take another rejection.

Where is my promise God? What good is my faith when I can't see the manifestation? I am holding onto things that seem impossible. When will the tables turn?

Every adversity we endure....every heartache that steals our breathe away was designed to awaken you to your purpose.

Life has a way of hiding our face from truth. We become so fearful that we disguise ourselves in order to survive.

After years of hiding we finally bury ourselves so deep in doubt that we lose our sense of true self. We lose our identity in the perils of our life.

We were created to be marvelous, unlimited and free of all bondages. Everything we need....every answer we seek is hidden within our souls.

We have lost ourselves because we have become so shallow. We think our circumstances, our possessions, our relationships, our successes and our rejections define us.

We are more then what is on the outside. Nothing in this natural world of form can even begin to define us. Nothing can hold us down. Nothing can steal the beauty that we contain inside of these mere vessels.

Outward circumstances change BUT what is within us is truth and it is eternal. Believe in yourself. Have faith in what GOD created you to be. Live freely as yourself.

There is beauty in every step you take. There is power in every word you speak. Trust in your organic self....in that deep inner most being....the part of you that can not be adulterated or touched.

Stand strong for who you are and change for no one. Don't let your circumstances define you....let them work for you. Let them be what helps propel you into a new level of consciousness.

Set yourself free.

Success

Many of us strive to be successful in life. We desire to have successful marriages, careers and families. We do all that we can to achieve what others percieve as successful. When we do not reach that level of "success" we often feel discouraged and become depressed. We can even lose our sense of self because we become defined by these things.

If our marriage is not working, we are unemployed or our family is broken we think we have failed. We see ourselves as worthless and lose our will to live.

I have come to realize over the last couple of years that being successful has nothing to do with anything external. It is not about the car you drive, your marriage, the house you live in, your children, or your career. True success is not measured with earthly possessions or accomplishments.

Everything you are and everything you will ever achieve is all by the grace of God. Possessions and accomplishments are just an outward manifestation of an inward realization. When you align yourself with God and allow Him to direct your path then He will guide you. He will manuever you into what He has already reserved and ordained for you.

I don't strive to be successful. I am successful because I live my life surrendered to God. Where ever I end up out of my obedience to God is where I am supposed to be.

At times we make our own plans and goals without consulting God. We ask Him to bless something that maybe He doesn't have planned for you. Instead of seeking His signature of approval we should ask Him to direct us. Where ever He leads you to you will find success.

Being successful to me is about fulfilling the will of God. God's thoughts are greater then my thoughts. What I dream for myself can not compare to what God has for me. My level of "success" might not be God's level of "success".

A lot of heartache and frustration will end when we can learn to surrender and be obedient to the spirit of God. Everything that God has ordained you to achieve, He has also prepared you for. Stop resisting the process. Your process is preparing you for the promise.

Be Free!

It is important that we understand that we are whole and complete in God. We are perfect in His eyes. We are designed to bring HIM glory. All that He creates is MARVELOUS and that includes you.

You don't have to pretend to be someone you are not in order to impress others or be accepted by them. God accepts you and loves you with all of your weaknesses and insecurities.

All that you are and all that you will ever be is wrapped up in His love. There are no mistakes and failures when you are walking in the will of God. Being obedient to His spirit is an essential part of being perfected in Him.

It is easy to get caught up in playing a role when you are trying to fit in with the world. Remember that you are in this world but not of it.

Your past does not define you or limit you. Your education does not define you or limit you. Every part of you is perfect because God has equipped you to fulfill His will.

Just rest in His arms and trust that His plan is good and all things are working out in your favour.

Be free in the beauty of His holiness. You have been set a part and reserved for such a time as this....so that His power, grace and mercy can be manifested through you.

Take no thought in what you shall be, in what steps you shall take, in what decisions you shall make. Rest in the Lord and He will surely direct your path.

All Praises Be Unto God!

Deal With It Or It Will Deal With You

It is easier to project our fears and insecurites on others rather then look in the mirror and confront them head on. We blame everyone else for our problems, fears, anxieties, insecurities, lack of motivation, obesity, poverty, sadness and so on. We like to deflect our weakness on other people to make ourselves seem stronger when really we are weak and out of control.

Doing this only keeps us in bondage and under the heaviness of our burdens. We stay wounded and continue to hide behind a mask. We live in the illusion that if we don't see the problems....if we sweep them under the rug they will eventually go away.

We try to cover up our pain and fears under layers of false identities. We try to be strong, funny, sophisticated, dedicated, educated or some other illusion just to avoid showing our true state. We don't want anyone to know what we are struggling with because we don't want to be vulernable. We are afraid that if we are transparent then someone will hurt us or take advantage of us.

In order to avoid dealing with ourselves we project our fears and insecurities on others. We get angry at them and blame them for our unhappiness. Our relationships become conditional. We only seek to be validated, satisfied or completed by others and if they do not fulfill that desire we leave them.

We lose friendships, significant others, business partners or family members because we no longer feel fulfilled in the relationship. It becomes easier to let them go then deal with our own issues and emotions.

Many times God removes these blinders in our lives so that we can see ourselves clearly. He removes jobs, relationships or other masks so that we can be honest with ourselves and begin to heal. When we become honest and stop blaming others for our state of being then we can truly begin to live authentic.

We will stop hiding behind the illusions, the pains, the fears and insecurities and we will begin to see ourselves as the wonderful and powerful vessels God designed us to be.

Stand Tall

Sometimes we try so hard to fit in that we lose ourselves. We allow others to conform our minds, kill our dreams, and distort our vision.

Don't be afraid to stand up for who you are and what you believe in. You are here on this earth to serve God and be a manifestation of His love and power.

Life IS Worth Living

Life has a way of knocking us down. The pain and rejection we experience often becomes too heavy to bare. The loss of a marriage, job, home, loved one or dream may even have us drowning in emotions and grasping for air. The burdens become so great that our will to live diminishes. Our passion for life becomes trapped under the rubble of our past. The thoughts of abandonement and loneliness keep us awake at night, contemplating the idea of death.

The pain was once so great in my life that I often struggled with thoughts of suicide. I thought that if I could just end my life I could end the pain. I felt that life would never get better. I was afraid that I would always experience some kind of pain and I just didn't want to feel that anymore.

I didn't feel that life was worth living until I realized that there was more to life then my pain. Life was not meant to be caotic and full of disappointments. I began to shift the way I saw my life and things began to change. I was no longer a prisoner of my past. I was no longer tormented by the thought of pain and rejection.
I was free to live life and embrace each moment of the journey.

I discovered a new sense of myself. I began to love myself and love life. I wasn't afraid to feel emotions anymore because they didn't control me. I now had the ability to feel them but yet not let them define me. I could feel sad with becoming depressed because I knew that each experience I encountered was there to help me grow. Every adversity was an opportunity to become stronger and more conscious of myself.

Now that I am awaken I wake up with excitement. I am excited to see what life has for me. I am excited to be all that God created me to be because I know He has equipped me. Every struggle I had prepared me for this journey and I am grateful. I praise God for all things and I surrender my heart each day to His will.

Life is worth living. Don't give up.

Boundaries

God has mapped out our territory and established our boundaries. Who is to say that we can not achieve what God has already ordained for us?

God has a specific plan for each of our lives. It is important to be sensitive to the spirit and allow Him to lead us in the direction of that destination. It is sometimes difficult to hear His voice when we are busy mapping out our own course. We think that we are in control of our own lives and so many times we don't consult the Lord for direction.

The word of God says that we should acknowledge Him in all our ways and He shall direct our path. He does not desire for us to feel stranded and alone in a world that we are not from. His word says that we are in this world but not of it. We often feel stranded, confused, lost and alone when we are trying to fit in. We are trying to get into a flow that we are not designed to follow.

We have been brainwashed to believe that we must meet a certain standard and live up to an expectation. If we do not achieve that level then we feel inadequate. We become depressed, angry, and frustrated because we have not achieved "success".

What is success? Success is to be all that God created you to be and to achieve all that He has ordained for you. Your bank account, clothes, cars, houses and education do not measure your success. Your success is measured by your character. If you are walking in the perfect will of God and you are obedient to His spirit then you are successful. Even without a house or a degree you have achieved greatness because you are great. You are walking in your true nature. You are unlimited because you are not trying to fit within the worlds boundaries.

You may be working to achieve a certain level of success because the world has dictated that dream to you. BUT what if God has something greater? The word of God says that His ways are not our ways....His thoughts are higher then our thoughts. He desires greater things for you. His word says, " eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man. The things which God hath prepared for them that love Him" (1 Corinthians 2:9).

The ego attaches itself to illusions. It lives in a world of fantasy and ideology. It defines itself by possesions, failures, accomplishments and relationships. It is unstable. The spirit is defined by nothing because it is unlimited and eternal.

God is not concerned with your fleshly desires. He is moved by your faith and willingness to be used by His spirit. Your trials are mere opportunites used to position you and lead you into your destined place...... your marked territory. God has defined your boundaries and no one can redefined them.

Have you ever attempted to do something that just didn't feel right? Maybe someone suggested you try something new. Maybe you saw an infomerical and your emotions got the best of you. You were desperate for change, progress or satisfaction so you bought into an illusion. I think we have all been there. We all buy into the illusion one time or another. We become so ego driven that we over step our boundaries.

God has a way of pulling us back in and keeping us on track. We can avoid most of our pain and disappointments if we would learn to be obedient to His spirit.....if we would acknowledge Him in all our ways and seek His wisdom. Remember your boundaries are marked and your path is set before you. All we have to do is yeild ourselves and follow Him. Trust in His word and have faith in His plan for our lives.

We must stop buying into the illusions placed before us. Let us walk by faith and not by sight.

NO Compromising!!!!

I was always fighting to fit in and be accepted. Lately I have found myself fighting against conforming. I don't want to be what others want me to be. I fight to be who God created me to be. I fight to keep my heart pure. I don't want to force myself to fit in a mold in order to be accepted or loved. I desire to be who God created me to be. If you don't understand me or like me then..OH WELL. I will never conform to be anyone else's idea of perfection.

I believe that my life's struggles and victories have molded me into the perfect vessel that God desires me to be to fulfill His purpose. I am not supposed to be like anyone else. I am not supposed to think or act like anyone else. I don't have to believe in what you believe in. I can think beyond what you can comprehend without trying to justify or explain myself.

It is so crazy to me because we often compromise our beliefs and minimize our accomplishments in order to satisfy someone else. We try to dim our own lights because we don't want to blind others. We want them to look at us and accept us. We don't want them to run away because they are intimidated or threatened by our strengthens.

I refuse to do that anymore. I refuse to be anything less then what God created me to be. YES!! I am great. YES!! I am beautiful, strong and powerful. I make no excuses for who I am or what I say because I am unique. God designed me to be unique for a reason. I have a purpose and you can't contain it within your little box. I am not suppoed to be normal or safe.

I am powerful beyond measure. You can't define me or place limits on me. God has marked my territory. He has given me the authority to reign and rule. No one can take away what God has blessed me with. They can try to step in and destroy what God has ordained but it will not succeed.

I will no longer allow others to dictate my future or happiness. I am free in the spirit of God. I am free to believe, receive and achieve all that God has ordained for me. Amen!!!

Confidence

I have had people comment on how I am confident. That is kind of a foreign word to me because I have always struggled with insecurities. What people perceive to be confidence is really just faith.

I know that my outer appearance is far from what others may perceive to be perfect. I have yet to achieve many of the goals I have set for myself. I still have a lot to learn and a lot to work on.

The one thing I have learned though is that who I am has nothing to do with what others can see with their natural eyes. The confidence that others see is really my faith in God. I trust that God has designed me for His plan and purpose. I am confident in His love for me and therefore I can walk with my head held high. I know that who I am and all that I will ever be is wrapped up in Him.

I am not confident in the way I look because my flesh is flawed. I am confident in who I am in God's eyes because He sees me as perfect. I am purposely designed to fit His divine plan. Having that realization sets you free from the mindset of never being good enough, pretty enough or skinny enough.

You no longer strive to fill in someone else's shoes or live up to someone else's expectations. You rest in your identity is God. You trust that where you are and where you are headed are controlled by Him. That is faith.......and true confidence.

Questions

What is my calling?
We are all called to be awaken to our identity in God. Every adversity in our lives creates an opportunity to reach beyond our understanding into a place of surrender. As we surrender we can then make space for our vastness.

What is my identity in God?
Unlimited. You are not defined by labels. Who you are can not be defined with words. You are spirit and you have the power and freedom to become and do whatever God's says you can. There are not limits to your potential.

What is my purpose?
To awaken others. God has designed us all to be a manifestation of His love. When we are awaken to our identity in God we can then walk this world without fear and fully embrace every opportunity given to be used by Him.

Resting In God

Due to some of the things I have experienced in my life, I had a hard time trusting anyone or anything. I was always very skeptical and over analyzed everything. I used to have major anxiety and control issues. I was very insecure and extremely depressed. I was so afraid of the world that I would spend most of my time hiding out in my house. I was afraid to show myself because I didn't want to be hurt or give anyone a chance to reject me.

It is crazy how much things have changed in my life. I find myself being very relaxed and passive about many things now a days. I even asked God if this is normal because I am at peace with things that used to cause me such stress. I didn't know if I was being lazy or non chalant about things or what was going on.

I realized that what has happened is I have learned to trust in God. I am resting in Him and trusting that every part of my life is in His hands. I don't have to worry about things because whatever is in my life right now is supposed to be in it. I seek peace above all things so if something or someone is not in my life at this time it is because it would not bring me peace.

I am making space for God to minister to my heart during this season of my life. I am resting and trusting because I know that what I am enduring right now is preparing me for the greater calling of God. Whatever I have been designed to achieve is depending on this moment of my life. I have to learn to be still and wait upon God. I am confident that everything has it's purpose and time.

There are times that I feel like I am a loser and not doing anything significant with my life. I wonder should I go back to school, should I do this, should I be doing that...but God constantly reminds me that I am exactly where I am supposed to be. I don't have to plan things out for myself. I have to just rest in Him. By developing this deep and strong relationship with Him I will know when to move and when to speak. I will know when it is time to embark on a new journey and when it is time to be still.

This is such a big deal for me because I know how I used to be. I always worried about everything. I used to cry myself to sleep thinking about my heartache and how my life was going to play out. I tried to control and manipulate things to go how I wanted them to go so I could feel better about myself. I tried to make people love me and accept me just to feel like I had value.

Now I don't care. If you don't want to be around me then you aren't supposed to. I am not rude or arrogant I just let life flow. I have learned to believe in God's sovereign plan for my life. It is not about me it is about God, His kingdom and His people. Wherever He sees fit to position me I have to move accordingly.

What a liberating feeling to know that God loves you and desires the best for you. Your life is all figured out and all you have to do is relax and enjoy the ride. ALL GLORY BE TO GOD!!!

The Blood

Never forget that the blood of Jesus runs through your viens. You have been bought with a price. Every disease, affliction and curse has been paid for by the blood of Jesus. Just because your father or mother have had a disease doesn't mean that you have to inherit the same issue. The poverty you were brought up in doesn't have to rest in your house. The addictions and mindsets of your parents don't have to plague your mind.

The women with the issue of blood in Mathew 9:20 dealt with her infirmity for 12 years. It was not until she was awaken to her identity in God that she was healed from it. She spent years looking for a healing. She went from physician to physician seeking a cure. Then one day she said within herself "If I may but touch His garment, I shall be made whole".

"She said within herself " means she became awaken. She understood her identity and knew that she didn't have to suffer with this issue anymore. She could attach herself to the word of God (the hem of his garment) that says "...and by His stripes we are healed" (Isaiah 53:5).

She didn't have to continue to bleed and suffer from her issues. She believed in her healing and touched Jesus. She didn't stay paralyzed in her fears. She didn't sit around feeling sorry for herself. She went for her healing and believed it to be so according to the word that was working within her.

That same word that healed her is inside of you. We all have been created by the word of God. We are the manifestation of God's living word. Attach yourself to the word and believe in what God has promised you. Allow His spirit to heal every issue and wound that has left you bleeding. His grace is sufficient for you. All you have to do is touch Him. Don't sit around waiting for someone to pick you up. Don't go from addiction to addiction......relationship to relationship.....doctor to doctor......temporary fix to temporary fix. Let the living word of God heal your issues. Let Him restore you and make you whole.

Freedom

It saddens me to think about how many of us are just trying to fit in. We do things just to be accepted without really putting any heart into it. We look for validation and acceptance from a world that is truly not even awaken to their own identity. What mold are you trying to fit in? Do you even know who you are and what you have been called to do?

There is so much judgement placed on us from the outside world. At times it can be difficult for us to express ourselves organically for a fear of rejection. We try to speak with caution yet never really saying what it is that our hearts want to say. We dream with limitations because we don't want anyone to think we are crazy. We limit our potential because we are trying to measure up to someone elses idea of success. What are we trying to fit into?

We are not designed to mock or conform ourselves into anything we can percieve with our natural eyes. God has designed us each uniquely to fulfill a certain plan. Your past experiences have all been ordained to equip you for the journey God has called you to travel. God knows you better then you know yourself. He knows your weaknesses and your strengths. They are each unique to your calling. They are what makes you effective in the Kindom of God.

Let me just keep it real and stop sugar coating the subject. Someone's sexual orientation, addictions or other current or past circumstances do not stop the hands of God. God knows exactly what you are doing and He knows exactly when you will stop.

The problem with the world is that we judge one another too much. We try to conform everyone into what we perceive to be perfect and acceptable. We condemn people for their shortcomings and measure their victories just to make us feel better about ourselves.

God does not look at our flesh. He tells us to know no man after the flesh. He looks at our heart. The word of God says that the issues of life flow from our hearts. God doesn't deal with the natural He deals with the spirit. He does not treat your symptoms He goes straight the source of the infection. He heals the heart which in turn heals your life.

So instead of judging one another out of fear we should speak life to one another out of love. I don't need to tell you what you should be. I don't have to tell you to stop your unhealthy, distructive behaviors. My job as a vessel of God should be to awaken you to your identity in God, allowing the truth within you to heal your heart.

Let's stop placing so much judgement on each other. Let's stop placing judgement on ourselves. Let the spirit of God minister to your heart as you seek Him in that secret place. You don't have to force yourself to fit into anyone's mold. You have been specifically designed to fulfill a plan and purpose on this Earth. Don't run around trying to please others. Let your heart be free in God.

Tricks

This morning was so crazy for me. I actually started getting extremely nervous and scared before going to the oral surgeon for my teeth extraction. I wasn't really afraid of the pain. I wasn't even afraid of the surgery. I was afraid of being put to sleep and not coming back out. I was also afraid of being put to sleep and still feeling everything and not having the ability to tell anyone what I was feeling. What is even more weird is I have been under general anasthesia before and for a longer period of time. So I really didn't understand what my issue was. I did know that I needed to get a hold of myself and release all of my fears before I walked into that doctor's office.

I began to pray and ask God to give me peace. I began to meditate and release my mind from attaching itself to the images that were playing in my head. I was watching every possible scenario play out in my mind and it was making me restless. I had become so nervous that I was tempted to just cancel the whole thing but I couldn't. I knew that the pain would persist and the infection would cause me more damage if I did not take care of it.

It is amazing how God uses the things in our lives to teach us some very important lessons. He doesn't allow us to experience pain because He likes to see us suffer. The opposite is true. He allows the pain to occur to move us past it and bring us to a state of constant peace. He makes room for miracles and healing.

You see most pain starts in the mind. Often times it doesn't start in our own mind, it may start in the mind of someone we love. We end up baring the pain and infirmities of our love ones because God built us strong enough to endure it. At times it is the decisions others make that cause us the most pain. We become the sacrifices for one another. We can become victimized by others because we can take on the fears of the generations before us. We don't have to stay victims though. We are not victims in a sense that we are helpless and unequipped to handle the pains. If God has allowed us to bare the pains and infirmities of others He has also given us the power to overcome them and break free from them.

What we fail to understand at times is that we are all one. Many times we become depressed and crushed by our burdens when we isolate ourselves. When we think we are alone and no one understands our pains. It is true that their are some that have never gone through your personal pain but since we are connected we do have to ability to feel one another's pains. We have the ability to have compassion and love for others and that is an opportunity for healing. That is an opportunity to feel the oneness of God and His spirit.

I was deeply moved with emotions last night and asked God why we have to feel pain. Why do people that seem innocent have to endure heartaches and things that literally or spiritually kill them? He showed me that we are all one body in Him. We each suffer and take on the infirmities of others not for evil but for the purpose of awaken all to our true identity in Him. Many times when a nation or a people endure a tragedy they are brought together by the love of God. They pull together breaking down the walls of racism, poverty, politics and religious views just to heal the hearts of humanity. This is what being awaken is all about.

Being awaken is a level of understanding that goes far beyond what the mind can comprehend. It is reached through a deep and supernatural connection to the unlimited realm of the spirit. It doesn't take intellect or book knowledge to achieve this level of spirituality. It takes a vulnerable and surrendered heart that is willing and passionately seeking the truth and to be set free.

When awaken we understand that we are all connected. We understand that even though someone may hurt us we have the ability to press through and even heal their heart through love. Our strength can be what brings another healing and deliverance. Our awakened spirit can help awaken one and also a nation. Let us be conscious that our decisions don't only affect us. We have the power to change the live of others. When one is weak another is strong and we move forward together as one as God has designed us to do. We are not alone along this journey. We are all connected by the same fabrics. We have all been created in the image and likeness of God. No on is any greater then another because in the spirit we are all one in the same.

This kind of understanding and awakening can not only heal you but heal the world. It will break down the walls of fear and violence because we no longer will be fighting to survive......we will be surrendering to love which is eternal life. We will understand that even in death there is life. In loss there is gain. We all have been created to contribute something to the world. We don't have to fight to be better. We must just strive to be our best.

You see through my fear of pain this morning I realized that I had given in the flesh...to the human side or nature of me. I had isolated myself. Although I trust and believe in God I allowed my spirit to be silenced by the cries of my fears. I had to silence the cries and once again find that connection to the source of life that breathes through me daily. I had to rest in the hands of God and trust that no matter what was or what would be, His will would be established. There is nothing in the world that can take authority over me unless God has allowed it.

I know that the mind plays tricks on us. It forms images and illusions that are far from the truth. The truth sets us free and brings us peace. Our mind, if not brought under subjection to the spirit, can cause us to be paralyzed with fear. It can stop us in our tracks and cause us to lose sight of God's truth. We can't worry about our past or our future. We must rest in the presence of the now. We must know that we know that we know that God is in control of all things and He only wants what is best for us. We must live by faith and not by sight. We can't be caught up in what our outward circumstances look like. We must trust and rest in God. That is where we will find our peace.

My mind said I would feel pain but right now I have not experienced any pain after my sugery. I have had minimal bleeding and I feel great. I didn't allow my fears to dictate my circumstances. I let God be and He showed forth His love and power. Amen.

Moving Forward

God has been dealing with me lately about stepping out of my fears. I know that in order to be all that He has called me to be and do I will have to move forward and not worry about what others think. I desire to move forward in my life with passion and make no excuses for who I am or what I believe.

I think we all look for that in life. We all want to be free from our emotions and fears. We all want to live our lives fully as ourselves and make no excuses. We don't want to live trapped in our pasts. We don't want to keep nursing the same wounds. We don't want to keep forcing ourselves to fit in molds that were not made for us. We don't want to keep fighting to be accepted, loved, acknowledged or appreciated.

God designed us all to be original. He designed each and everyone of us with a specific assignment in mind. Everything we have gone through in our lives, whether we think it was good or bad, served a purpose. We may never know the total plan of God but yet and still it will be established. His will will dominate whatever plan you think you have set up for yourself. He will interrupt your whole life just to fulfill His plan for you.

I trust in Him. I believe that He desires all good things for me because He loves me. Others may have rejected me, abandoned me or lied to me but God never has and He never will. His love is eternal and sufficient. It doesn't matter what I have been through, what I have done or what I haven't done. God's love will carry me through every adversity as it always has. His love will illuminate my path and open doors that no man can shut. He will receive the glory for my life. Everything that I do will be done unto Him because I know where I used to be and what He has brought me from.

He deserves to get all the glory and praises for my life because I wouldn't be who I am without Him. That is what I am confidient in now. I am confidient in who He has created me to be. I don't have to live a prisioner to my past. He has set me free from the bondages of my mind. He has healed my heart and restored my soul. I belong to Him and that gives me such peace.

I don't have to worry about my future or past because He is always present. Every rejection, every fall, and every pain has served it's purpose and it is all good in the eyes of God. Although my mind did not understand at the time, I have learned to lean on Him. I have learned to rest in His arms and allow His spirit to strength me when I don't know how to go on another day.


I will live everyday unto God and walk boldly before His throne. I will speak with authority and give Him all the praise. I will be confident in who HE has created me to be and conscious of the power He has invested in me. I am unlimited and all things are possible because I DO BELIEVE. AMEN!!!!!!

Numbing The Pain

Recently I have been dealing with a toothache. I was supposed to get all my wisdom teeth extracted several years ago but only had one done. I was too afraid of dealing with the pain. Then about a year ago my dentist recommended that I get my last two wisdom teeth extracted and once again I avoided the surgery because I was afraid of the pain. My wisdom teeth occasionally bothered me but the pain was pretty manageable and I was able to numb it and deal with it. Until now....

The pain that I have been dealing with lately has reached it's limit. I currently have an infection, my throat hurts, my head hurts and my face is swollen. I can no longer keep these teeth in my mouth. I have to confront my fear of pain and get them extracted once and for all.

This ordeal had me think about our pain in life. We have all been through painful things in our lives. Whether we endured the pain from our own decisions or from the actions of others, we have all felt it. The dangerous part is not the pain. The dangerous part is trying to numb the pain and not deal with it.

Many of us try to cover up the pain of our past with bandaids. Such as alcohol, food, work, relationships, drugs, cigarettes, or some other unhealthy habit. We don't want to confront the pain so we cover up our emotions. Eventually that pain surfaces again. Something occurs in our life and exposes our wounds.

We get to a place were we have no choice but to deal with the issues that we have been trying to numb. Our life becomes "infected" and the pain or unresolved issues become too painful to bare.

This happen to me about 2 years ago. I had lost my job, I was living with a family member, I was overweight, and insecure about everything in my life. I began to seek God and ask Him to show me who I was. He really began to show me what I wasn't. I wasn't my past. I wasn't the insecure person that I thought I was. The reason I was in so much pain was because I associated everything I had been through with who I was. I was too focused on the pain.

One day I was so frustrated I began to cry out loud. I said "God tell me what to do...speak to me....I want to hear your voice". He said "shut up". Now some may think I am crazy but this is exactly what He spoke to my spirit. You see many of us are so focused on our pain and discomfort that we fail to listen. Our cries become louder then His voice.

Life doesn't have to be dramatic. We don't always have to endure pain. We don't have to live in constant caos and struggle. We chose to live this way. We chose to focus on the pain and wallow in our sorrows. We are so accustomed to dealing with the drama that we have identified ourselves with it and so we reap more of it.

God had me silent for a season. He taught me to meditate and hear His voice. I found peace by being still and listening to my own breath. I found beauty in the nothingness. I reached a place of sacredness and aweness because I discovered who I really was in God.

I no longer had to numb the pain because I no longer associated myself with it. I no longer craved it. It's crazy how we don't want to be involved in caos but yet we unconsciously seek it. Why? Because we don't know how to live without it. We don't know who we are without it. There is an uncertainty when we are in an unfamiliar territory. Our flesh is no longer supported and we become fearful of the unknown.

This is what it is to live by faith. We are not supposed to know anything according to our flesh. We are to walk with our eyes closed and trust in the Lord. We are supposed to live limitless without attaching ourselves to egoic thoughts.

Our spirit knows to trust in God but our human "egoic" mind tries to protect itself. It tells you to hide, retract, avoid a certain situation because you will experience more pain. You must slowly begin to extract those thoughts from your mind by not attaching yourself to them.

Meditation and prayer played a big part in my healing. I allowed my mind to be free in God. Even though my flesh did not understand everything I allowed whatever God desired to be present in my life. I opened my heart and surrendered to the NOW. I learned to live true to myself. I learned to live by faith.

Stop numbing the pain and begin to live the way God intended for you to live.

Coming OUT Of The Shadows

Today was such a powerful day for me. God's presence was so tangible. I received some words today from God. He said it is time to step out of the shadows.

By reading my blog you know that I have gone through some pretty tough things. I know that I have not come out and told you all the specifics but I will share that in another post at a later time. Right now all that I want you to know is that I know what deep pain, disappointment and rejection feels like. I also know what it feels like to live through years of self loathing and a victim mentality. I have also experienced the death grip of fear.

In the beginning of my journey I wasn't really sure why I had to go through a lot of the things I went through. I spent many years blaming everyone else for my pain and discomfort. I didn't understand that everything I had gone through from my childhood to the present day was to draw out what God has placed within me. I didn't know that He was drawing out His glory. I didn't know that I was His treasure that was hidden in an earthen vessel.

Today I do stand with my head held high and fully aware of my purpose. I am conscious that everything I endured was to prepare me for His plan. I was designed with God's plan in mind. I was created to manifest His power and bring hope to His people. I was called and chosen to show His love in every aspect of my life.

Although we have not all gone through the same trials and we have not all been called to perform the same assignments. We have all been called to walk in our true identity in God and manifest His love. His love endures all things and sets our hearts free from the torturous thoughts of rejection, pain and disappointment.

We are not called to remain in the shadows of our past. God has called us forth through the pain to be more then a conqueror. We are called to be overcomers. We are not just here to win battles. We are called to step out of the trenches and live in constant love and peace. God's grace and mercy is sufficient for you. You don't have to struggle with your daily loathing and self pity thoughts. You can rest in God and live free of your past.

You may be thinking but HOW? How do I move passed the pain, rejection, abuse, abandonment, adultery, or loss? How do I press through the uncertainties and learn to love again?

You do it by realizing that you are a manifestation of God and everything in your life has been a set up. You release everyone that has wronged you or caused you pain from the guilt. You forgive them and forgive yourself. You realize that what you have gone through does not define you. You don't have to pick up that same cross everyday. God already took on your infirmities, afflictions, and pains. You can be free.

I know how uncomfortable and vulnerable it feels to not know why? I know how painful it is to look back and remember what they did to you. "Why didn't they love me enough to treat me right. I trusted them. I needed them. I loved them."

Know that God allowed all of it. They had to hurt you, leave you and forsake you. They had to commit adultery, abuse you, and turn their back on you. You were meant to feel lonely, angry, sad, and hopeless. How could you ever know what light is if you never experienced the dark?

All of those dark moments in your life brought you to this point where you are seeking His light....seeking His truth......seeking your identity.....seeking your healing. Had it not been for all of the past pain I had gone through I wouldn't be able to discern the spirit of God. I wouldn't be able to minister to His people. I wouldn't be awaken to my identity, purpose or power.

Every heavy weight of depression that I had to carry only made my spirit stronger and more dependant on God. Now that I acknowledge God in all my ways I can walk in peace. I can walk free of my pain and walk in His constant joy and peace.

God has called me and He has called you to come out of the shadows. Make this day a new beginning. Promise yourself to live each day conscious of God's purpose for your life. He wants you to be free of pain. Today is the day.

It is time to come out of the shadows and walk in His light. It is time that your mind be set free from the burdens of life. It is time that you trust in God and His love for you. Step out and walk in all that God created you to be.

The Splinter

Sometimes it's the little things that happen in our lives that cause us so much pain.

I was reminded today when I was removing a splinter from my mom's finger about our little trials. We tend to forget that our trials pale in comparison to the glory that shall be revealed in us.

We allow the little splinters in our lives to steal our vision. We allow them to hinder us because we are afraid.

Don't forget how great you are. Let your true strength swallow up the splinters in your life.

Let go and let God take the splinters out of your life. Each one serves a purpose. You are not subject to them....they are subject to your God.